A Winter’s Miscellany

Lauds and Libations, sorta

I used to call this blog feature Lauds and Libations, to talk about what I was consuming, media-wise, and what I consuming, beverage-wise. However, after a brief period of NO LONGER BREASTFEEDING GIMME ALL THE BEERS AND THE WINES, I’ve stopped drinking. So this sporadic blog feature may continue in the non-alcoholic sense. In any case, the last alcoholic beverage I enjoyed was

Odell’s Isolation Ale

This was an excellent cold-weather ale. I don’t have much else to say about it because it was about three weeks ago.

Something non-liquid that I have been enjoying are Barbara’s Cheese Puffs. These are the best natural foods store version of Cheetos I have found — really, I think they’re better than Cheetos*, less greasy. And because they’re organic or non-GMO or whatever the hell and you can buy them at a natural foods store, you can pretend they are good for you! I ate half a bag for lunch yesterday. HEALTH!

Media consumption

Movies

I watched all the Die Hards, and by that I mean, Die Hard and Die Hard with a Vengeance. I recognize that John McClane is a fantasy, but at least in the first trilogy he’s not a militaristic fantasy, just a sloppy crabby guy who has some skill and inventiveness, and a shitload more luck and rage. All I remember about the second one is Robert Patrick (briefly) and some bad guy who got his head stuck in a luggage squisher. Do airports really have luggage squishers? Is this a space-saving device?

I also watched The Black Dahlia, because it was at the library and I needed to get something adult-looking to offset Aladdin. What a mess. The story was a fun convoluted tangle, which I think noirs should be if they possibly can and visually it was very nice — yes, Brian De Palma is a great filmmaker — but the pacing felt bizarre and the acting was all over the place. Hilary Swank looked like she was having a great time, as did Fiona Shaw, while the male leads all acted like they were passing kidney stones for at least half of the movie. (Hey, it was the 1940s. Kidney stones were rampant, right?) Worst of all were the sex scenes. I hesitate to call them that, since they mostly consisted of

A) Kissing

B) Fade to black

C) Post-coital kissing/nuzzling

The tone of the love scenes was, I think, supposed to be frantic, but instead it just looked like two mannequins on strings, jerking and bumping against each other. Lots of head wobbling. Very uncomfortable.

I really liked seeing the portrayal of L.A. lesbian nightlife/subculture. And it did make me want to watch The Man Who Laughs.

Note: A. pointed out that the DVD box didn’t have a single blurb. Not even a “DARING! – Rex Reed.” (Does Rex Reed do DVD box blurbs? He should.)

Also started watching Wolf Hall. It makes The Tudors look like softcore. Oh wait, no, The Tudors makes The Tudors look like softcore. Mark Rylance has such a sad muppet face for every time someone insults his low birth, it’s almost a self-created drinking game. Nice to see Joanne Whalley. Do you think Henry VIII really stood like this all the time?  Most actors/directors seem to think so.

Every time I look up stuff online about this show, I accidentally type Worf Hall into the search bar, which OMG, please Internet, get on it because I don’t have time.

Books

Reading: just about everything by Courtney Milan and Tessa Dare and Sarah MacLean. Tessa Dare is hysterical. After a surfeit of dukes and earls and saucy ladies, I also read The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins. Highly recommended. As other people have commented, it has a Gone-Girl unreliable-narrator feel, but it also reminded me of Prime Suspect.

Links

Being a Girl: a brief personal history of violence

(h/t my buddy @sasha_feather)

Some book recs: Top 10 Winter Reads from Kirsty Logan

A Vincent Price radio show I’d not yet discovered: The Price of Fear

 

 

 

*BLASPHEMY. Oh, whatever.

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