State of the Pred
We’re over a week or two in and so far the prednisone has not made me more crazy. I count it as a win. Therefore, Happy Christmas Eve to those of you who celebrate it! I plan on celebrating with A., our pup, my giant belly, and friends. Maybe I’ll make some popcorn…
Boobology in a Biological Sense, You Pervs 101
I forgot to mention, A. and I went to a breastfeeding course at our local hospital a while ago. I almost fell asleep halfway through the powerpoint presentation. Why do you need a powerpoint to teach breastfeeding? Here’s a hint: you do not. We got one, though! We also got a sassy Australian breastfeeding video that was instructive and clear about how to breastfeed correctly. We also got to see lots of breastfeeding paraphernalia, including pump attachments, nipple shields, and a fake stuffed breast. Creepy delightful thing about the stuffy: you could peel back the front skin to look at the milk ducts underneath. And finally, we also got to practice holding baby dolls.
It had silvery eyes, like a Midwich Cuckoo. We got to the class early, so we took a lot of goofy pictures with it, but I’m not posting any of them here in case someone from our hospital sees and decides we are too immature to be allowed to take a real baby home.
During this class I think I had my first actual jolt of Oh my god, we’re eventually going to be allowed to take a real baby home. It made me want to run away and eat a pound of Cadbury Mini-eggs, while saying “Dude” and “I do what I want, whatever!” and then stay up late watching MeTV’s Lost in Space reruns and then call in sick to work. Ha ha ha, like I could have stayed up any later than this class went. I am officially crotchety and old, everyone.
Useless Ineffable Questions of the Day
Do you believe babies remember the trauma of birth, or is this hooey? What about those moments after birth? What about the jaundiced babies who get put under the grow lights with little baby-sized protective UV glasses? Do we remember anything unaffectedly and honestly, or do we and our malleable brains just make shit up out of the cloth of things our parents/influences told us at varying stages throughout our lives?